At this point even bad news is better then no news; at least we could make definitive plans. Yet, as it stands, I have heard naught but two demoralizing and echoing nos. So we wait. So we pine. So we dig to an unknown end. Taking steps in the dark hoping not to step on discarded nails. Stopping starting stopping starting repeated until the end of it. Packing and moving to Colorado for work or school or a time or eternity. There is a brief/lucrative job awaiting that will immensely alleviate any and all financial obligations. At least that brings a modicum of light to the future...that's good. Still, I feel I am returning to the equilateral mother land just to continue treading water.If my age weren't as lofty a digit as it is I would consider a new path; if I continue to get lambasted after another year of trying that may just be what I have to do. The problem is, I don't have the slightest inkling of what that newness might be.
Vexing.
"And yet, and yet, this New Road will some day be the Old Road, too..."-- a quote I found inscribed on cobblestone in Edinburgh by Neil Monro
This is rough. I'll send you an email with more depth soon...probably today.
ReplyDeleteAnd it will be sad not living so close. I really looked forward to your visits.
Keep punching.
Great picture. Although I hope it is not this dim...really.
ReplyDeleteAt least you have a wife? Said after a week of hormonal/stress induced freak outs.
I am selfish, I wish you were an eternal code enforcement officer, like I may be.
ReplyDeleteI do understand your dilemma and I feel empathy in my butt for your problem.
Maybe you can stay?
Alright, alright, I know you can't. Here is the thing, you'll do great wherever. As far as satisfaction........
"It is better to be a human being dissatisfied than a pig satisfied; better to be Darren dissatisfied than a fool satisfied"
ReplyDeleteaw. i'm sorry. we've been there too.
ReplyDeleteWe have?
ReplyDeleteDarren, you're too brilliant and young to let the man get you down. I've got nothing but the most in confidence and respect for you, friend. You're smarter than I am anyhow and I'm preaching to the choir when I say this, but don't take the non-acceptances personally. If academia isn't the thing, then the thing is bound to come out from behind the bushes in all its glory and brilliance. Easier to say to somebody else than to yourself....anyway, it's nice that I'm not the only one with a stressful blog entry every once in a while.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the Edinburgh quote....that's a nice one. I'll have to watch for that one when I go.....eventually.
So few are brilliant or lucky enough to have their paths laid out in front of them. The rest of us must trudge along, sometimes in the dark, feeling out the next step or handhold. You have come such a long way from the kid with the terrible glasses.
ReplyDeleteI'll wager that the answer will be really hard work.
It is tough. Hang in there. So sad you are leaving though.
ReplyDeleteWhat the heck g-man? Do I know you?
I agree, you'll do great wherever you end up.
Good luck, buddy.
ReplyDeleteI will personally travel to every school you've not received a letter from and threaten people. I have a sick mind full of Inquisitional tortures I will promise to all these so called smart people. I have also looked into my soul windows and found nothing there, so I'm think I'm good on the whole eternal front.
If you're the Nancy that worked with Darren, then you know me.
ReplyDeleteHello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the Aluguel de Computadores, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://aluguel-de-computadores.blogspot.com. A hug.
ReplyDeleteI think you have reached a new level of cool. You now have spanish speaking laptop hawkers posting on your site. And you know how I feel about that. When the world has you down, just think, "Aluguel de ComputadoresUm - blog sobre o aluguél e locação de computadores e notebooks."
ReplyDeleteNay, Portuguese spammers. Even more elitist than the Spanish speaking variety.
ReplyDeleteyour coolness is skyyyyrocket in flight
crazy where 2a.m. blogsurfing will take you. and just the other day i heard a guster song while at chili's and i thought about "guster t-shirt day".
ReplyDeleteFinally some solid evidence, that picture is solid proof you have a folder full of dark and gloomy pictures ready at hand. Emo? Oh I think so.
ReplyDeleteIt sucks that you are moving too, now I don't even have the chance of stopping in, when I'm in the SLC hunting lizard men. (for scientific purposes, that of mating with them to create an amazing new race.)
where'd you go, my friend?
ReplyDeleteI hope you two are well.
Darren, come back to us.
ReplyDeleteIt's cold here. Metaphorically. Bring your beard.
my apologies friends.
ReplyDeletea new post is forthcoming.
Good. It is hard to stalk you, old friend, when you do not post. Especially when this last post kept me on the edge...where oh where did you decide to be???
ReplyDeleteNeed more Darren. Don't pretend that you are busy and important.
ReplyDelete